Rinse and Repeat

My attempts to operate heavy machinery were foiled.  I just can't help but listen when the Worldwide Loser in Sports attempts to "fairly cover" a "big" game.  To try to hide my interest in the game, I wore my old glasses so that everything was slightly fuzzy.  I'd say that idea was a big winner.  Everything looks better when it's fuzzy.

From my pre-kick-off notes:

- We are 20-point underdogs.
- Are there any Hokies in the stands?  (Who would want to go?)
- ESPN called it "daunting" for us.
- Beamer says this is the best team he's ever played.
- Alabama wins the toss.  Roll Tide.
- Why do we like to wear such ugly unis?  At some point, can we stop letting practically teenage boys pick out our uniforms?

And then... what we all wanted to hear...

- 6'6".  260.

Boy, was I pumped up after all that pre-game hype!  Gone are the days of Top 10 pre-season rankings.  Gone are the days of hope for The Giraffe.

Roll, Tide.  Roll.

And they rolled, and they rolled.  They rolled during punt returns and kick-off returns - really during anything that some of us used to get excited to watch, aka, "Beamerball".  But, you know what?  Alabama really looked pathetic during that game.  If anything, it seemed like they certainly won't be ranked #1 long.  Now, I've heard speculation that Alabama was merely trying to hide its O-scheme from the teams that really count.  I can buy that.  I prefer to believe that they just can't live up to the hype this year.  We lost , so I'm free to be a Hater.

My favorite thoughts:

- The Fullers are awesome.  I hope we have 3 more coming to prop up our D for the next decade.
- The Giraffe throwing on 3 & 1 - ahhh... it's like Stiney never left.  Oh WAIT!  He was right up there in the booth!  Did anyone else see that?
- The ESPN guy laughed uncontrollably at the comparison of The Giraffe to Cam Newton.
- Who would let their kids hold big foam fingers after... Miley?
- Per the booth, "What an awful effort by DJ Coles."
- Also per the booth, when we sacked the QB, he was "down for a loss".
- Edmunds.  Trey Edmunds.  Watching him and the Fullers may be the only things keeping me from dark places this season.
- Alabama (the SEC) playing us (the ACC), is like us playing JMU Northern VA Community College.
- OK, so maybe the Freshman walk-on Fullback, Sam Rogers, will be another reason to watch this season.
- Per the booth, "6'6", 250+"... apparently The Giraffe was wasting away throughout the game.
- 97 yards of O for Bama in the 1st half.
- Per the booth, The Giraffe "stumbled".  Or he was knocked down.... why doesn't ESPN like to admit it when a QB gets hit?  Maybe we should rank every team #1 so no one gets their feelings hurt.
- There were two #10's for Alabama.  Isn't that illegal or something?
- Did we not bring our band or cheerleaders?  Did absolutely no one from Blacksburg make the trip?
- Only 207 total O yards for Bama.
- If we put Leal in, can't we at least let him attempt one single throw?

Another.  Season.  Opening.  Loss.

... And... Clemson is ranked #8?!?!  So glad they don't grace our schedule this year.

As much as I am down on The Giraffe, no one can say that it was all his fault.  He threw multiple passes that could have been easily caught.  No one acted like they had ever caught a pass before.  Oh Danny Coale, where are you?  Boykin?  Anyone??

Our D looked pretty darn good.  Give 'em hell, Bud!  Enough said.

Alright, now that the game has been purged from my brain, it's time to say a few words regarding tomorrow's game.

First off, I will be attending this one, for no other reason than it's an acceptable maroon game.  I can't wait to drive down 81 butt-early tomorrow morning so that I can make a 1:30 kick-off.  It's truly the stuff dreams are made of.  I just hope that the new doughnut place I heard about is open after the game... or maybe El Rod.  Of course they'll be open.

Secondly, this is history, man.  HISTORY.  It's our first game against the mighty CATAMOUNTS of Western Carolina.  North or South?  Neither!

A Catamount is apparently a wild cat - like a cougar, or lynx, or puma, or mountain lion.  See below.

The U of Vermont actually uses this super-cool mascot name, too.  They don't have a football team, though, so we can all breathe a sigh of relief.

Yeah, yeah... I know.  There's nothing wrong with a good made-up mascot name.  But come on, who ever decided that purple was a fierce color?

Since there is no history between us and the Mounted Cats in the prestigious Southern conference, I can't really use my imagination to come up with something interesting.  It's game two, but, so far as I'm concerned, it's game one.

Let's just enjoy the drive down, try not to get speeding tickets, and avoid the awful Sheetz restroom at the exit number I can't remember.  Going down to the beautiful New River Valley is always a treat, especially when wearing maroon is an acceptable practice.

I will enjoy it.  Hopefully you will enjoy it.  Let's just see what playing Northern VA Community College the Mounted Cats can do for our Offense.  Maybe someone will decide that they can catch.  I expect over 250 yards from Edmunds, who I know needs a nickname.  GIVE ME SOME TIME!

For those of you stuck with the Worldwide Loser, 1:30 is definitely late enough in the day to drink, even if you are at home... alone.

And, wear your glasses.

Love the smell of turkey legs in Lane,
The B.S.C.

P.S. Although my Miley comment RE: last week's game sits above, this atrocity sits on our website RIGHT NOW.