Exit 118B: To Eject or Discharge Forcefully

In prepping for today's pre-game article, one word kept coming to mind: barf. Now, in order to just sorta class it up a bit, I decided to instead use the more "medically sound" word... "vomit".

According to Merriam-Webster, to vomit is to have the food, liquid, etc., that is in your stomach come out through your mouth because you are sick. The Giraffe makes me want to vomit. A lot. Some fun synonyms:

gag heave hurl puke retch spew spit up throw up upchuck lose one's lunch toss one's cookies

Perhaps, the best movie clip EVER about such things...

I know you may be shocked after all the tossing and losing talk above, but I have to say that I actually liked our uniforms this past week. The Hokie-colored camo was kinda neat. I dug it.

What I didn't dig, as always, was The Worldwide Loser in Sports proclaiming asinine things after 1 series of play, like "Beamerball is back in Blacksburg!" So yes, we blocked a punt and Kyle Fuller returned it for a TD... but let's not go jumping to conclusions. The whole concept of Beamerball has yet to make a return to Blacksburg; and honestly, I'm not sure if Frank can ever bring it back.

For a long-as-crap game, I wrote one measly page of notes. Most notably, the Water Buffalos had 34 players on the squad from the Miami area. Is it surprising that they had so many penalties? Or started a fight with Kendall Fuller?

Let's just put it out there - Kyle Fuller is a bad-a$$ older brother. Note to other teams: do not mess with the baby Fuller. Big brother Kyle will not let it go unnoticed. It was so awesome to see him run across the field to defend Kendall... warms the heart, doesn't it?

Amongst all the drug speculation and such, Journell didn't even dress for the game. Frank says that he broke team rules and was forced to sit out a game. I think Frank probably saw my article and thought, "hey, why not let a walk-on go at it this week?"... enter Keyserling. He wasn't exactly on point, but just the mention of walk-on warmed my heart. Again. This really was a warm and fuzzy game, wasn't it?

So in OT, they block our FG, then we block theirs... then we recovered a fumble.... and somehow, The Giraffe manages to score in OT #3 and get the 2-point conversion.

And, somehow, yet again... we manage to win a horribly ugly, awful game. I don't know why, but for some reason we pulled out another one. Retch.

Is it bad to wish that The Giraffe would maybe get a bad stomach bug or something? I'd just like to see Leal for one game. Just. One. Game. You know... some bad El Rod or Gumby's or something... nothing too horrible.

So onto the Bumbly Bees. What will it be this year, ESPN? The spread offense? The spread option? The triple option? Will you come up with yet another term for it? I wait with bated breath to hear what your genius will say on Thursday night.

In an effort to beat out MD for the ugliest helmets ever, we will be wearing these:

All good Hokies love us some Hokie Stone, but give me a break. This takes hard-headed to a whole new meaning. Hurl.

This is our 11th time playing the lesser Tech, and we lead the series 7-3. The Bumbly Bees are 3-0 on the season, beating UNC, Duke, and Elon. And, the poor Bumbly Bees are planning a white-out for this game. Spew.

Redshirt-Soph. Tim Seager might show up on the Offensive Line. Boo him, even from your couch. He is from Heaven on Earth, and went down to the Bumbly Bees to play. Inappropriate. Traitor!

Here's the most notable stat that you need to know about what Bud Foster is about to face - they have scored 136 points in their 3 games this year. WOW. ESPN will love that, I'm sure. I know that we trust in Bud, but that is pretty darn scary. The Fullers better be on point for Thursday night. After a long, long game and a short week, this game is going to be very heave-worthy. Oh, and they've allowed only 34 points in 3 games on D. Yeah... I know what you're thinking. Get The Giraffe some old Gumby's!

It's just the same 'ol, same 'ol... secretly hope to win while realizing that there is a better than average chance we'll stink the whole game. Keep working on that memory, folks. It's not gonna get any better.

I won't try to call this one. I'll leave it up to some Worldwide Loser of Sports genius - like Lou Holtz.