Shhhhhh.
Can the Ashley Madison of NCAA football be forgiven?
Well, it's been a while my friends. Have you stayed thirsty? After that Boston College game, I simply couldn't bring myself to type about us anymore. In fact, it pains me to have to attempt to type about us again as we enter yet another season... unranked. Gag. Heave.
Did you know that Bud has been at VT since 1987? And, he's been the Defensive Coordinator since 1995? That man has the patience of a Saint. I don't know how else to explain it. He is our one and only hope this season (mind the name of the website). That, and, well, a miracle.
Saint Bud
- St. Bud, Of the Jaw Muscles
- St. Bud, the Patron Saint of Pressure
- St. Bud, the Omnipresent
Etc., etc...
Keep in mind, we did beat the Buck-holes last year. It was our pre-season bowl game. It was the pinnacle of our season. It was 35 to 21 and The Hobbit looked like he would actually turn into a promising QB. The days of He Who Shall Not Be Named were finally over and Frank promised us that this was our guy.
Fast forward a year and it's looking like we're all Phil Connors in Punxsatawney, P-A. How many years are we going to hear from Frank that this is "our guy" at QB? How many years will we be unranked? How many years is St. Bud going to hang around this crap?
Yes, I am bitter.
I'm sure the Buck-holes are bitter, too. We served up their only loss last year, and, well... we were BLOODY AWFUL. EGREGIOUS!!
I'm pretty sure that they will be looking to correct that misstep tomorrow. The only thing going for us is that we're at home. That, and St. Bud. St. Bud's going to give 'em hell. St. Bud always gives them hell.
I had a VT tee on the other day at the White Trash (WT) Wal-mart in Winchester - you know, the one that borders West Virginny on Route 50. I love that Wal-mart, but that is a story for another day and another blog. In all fairness, VT tees make up about 30% of my entire wardrobe, so I only happened to be wearing it because it was clean. The man behind me in the cigarette line (because often the cigarette line is the ONLY line open there) thanked me for waking up his Buck-holes (he may have called them something else) last season.
He was so smug.
He was too uppity for my WT Wal-mart.
I told him that it was essentially our bowl game, and I expected it to be our bowl game this year as well. I wished him good luck, and went on my way.
I hate smug Buck-hole fans. They really are smug, aren't they?
I hope one day we can be smug Hokie fans. I was smug in the days of Vick and Tyrod. Now, I am gums (the opposite of smug), I suppose.
Oh Lord, no one wants to be gums. Gums are disgusting.
Wow... I just looked up Buck-hole to see if it has an actual definition. Ohhh... maybe I should apologize?
No time for that.
I'm not going to size up the game or make any predictions. I think the plan for this season is just to let this all play out and see what the heck happens... oh, and see if I can stand typing through it. I mean, we're only playing the defending National Champions. The #1 ranked team in the country.
As a good blogger, I just decided to do a little follow-up research on the Buck-hole. I found this:
Totally makes sense.
Now this?
And this...
I need to do more research on this whole cat reference, but I have to say that I like it.
And, last, but not least, the all-powerful Google via the magic of Al Gore, gave me this under the image search for "Buckhole".
Well, at least I know I'm not original. Sigh.
So, I'm going to make beef dip and a strong beverage, and watch with a disposition somewhere in between naive optimism and reluctant horror tomorrow night. At least the beef dip is salty.
In the meantime, take advantage of the Labor Day sale and buy yourself one of these:
I'm now a Bills fan. Are you?
Dear Buck-holes,
Please be mediocre and fail miserably. This is probably the highlight of our season, so be nice.
Thanks,
The B.S.C.
Love St. Bud, the Gingivitis Cure,
The B.S.C.
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