------------------------------
Oh, the Places You'll Go!
Congratulations!
Today is your last college fray.
You're off to Sundays, right?
You're off and away!
You may have brains in your head.
You have big feet in your shoes
You can promote yourself
in any position you choose.
You're on your own now. And you know what you know.
Now some NFL team will decide where in the world you will go.
You'll look up and down teams. Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I hope I can play there."
With your head lacking brains and your shoes full of feet,
I'm sure you'll end up in a not-so-good seat.
And you may not find any
and all the announcers will frown.
In that case, of course,
as a late-round pick, you'll likely drown.
You are better-suited there
in the late-round square.
Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as disappointing
and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen,
don't worry. Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.
OH!
THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!
You'll be on your way!
You'll be seeing some sights!
You'll join the bench warmers
who have similar plights.
You'll lag behind, because you lack any speed.
You'll disappoint ESPN and your praises they'll plead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the worst pest.
Wherever you go, your play-time will be hard-pressed.
Except when you decently play
Because, sometimes, you look okay.
I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
that sometimes good plays
can happen, even to you.
You can play up
in a high-flying perch.
And your announcers will fly on
Nothing left to besmirch.
But, you will come down from that Perch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll remain in your Slump.
And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.
You will come to a place where the benches are not marked.
Some scoreboards are lighted. But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you NOT win?
And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and do a QB-sneak from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.
You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled routes at a break-necking giraffe pace
and grind on for three yards across weirdish wild space,
headed, I know, toward a most useless place.
The Wishing Place...
...for people just wishing.
Wishing for a play to go
or a play to come, or Stiney to go
or a new playbook to come, or Beamer to go
or Bud to take over, or Weaves to go
or wishing around for a Yes or a No
or wishing for their own QB to grow.
Everyone is just wishing.
Wishing for another QB, even a sprite
or wishing for a season that might
or wishing around for games on Thursday night
or wishing , perhaps, for your leg to break
or a the cannon to boom, or for Lane to shake
or a string of first downs, or a pair of Hokie chants
or a lack of orange effect, or an Offense with a chance.
Everyone is just wishing.
YES!
That sounds just like YOU!
I'm positive you'll fail
all that wishing and staying.
You'll find no bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.
With banners flip-flapping,
once more we'll ask why!
Getting drafted in any round? Why oh why?
We're asking because you're that kind of a guy!
Oh, the places you'll go! There is chaos to be done!
There are points to be scored. There are new fans to shun.
And the nonsensical things you can do with that ball
will make you the losing-est loser of all.
Says ESPN, you'll be as famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you lose on TV.
Except when you don't.
Because, sometimes, you won't.
I'm afraid that some times
you'll play mediocre games too.
Games you can win
'cause no one is taller than you.
So tall!
Whether you like it or not,
Tallest will be something
you'll be quite a lot.
And when you're tall, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.
But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.
On and on you will hike
Your size will take you far
Maybe you'll face up to your problems
whatever they are.
You'll get mixed up, of course,
as we already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange giraffes as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.
And will you succeed?
Chances are slim, slim indeed!
(98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.)
GIRAFFE, YOU'LL HIT WALLS!
So...
be your name Stiney or Weaves or Bray
or Beamer Bud Van Leal O'Shea,
you're off to Some Places!
Today is your last college fray!
Your walls are waiting.
So...get on your way!
.. and good riddance!
---------------------
I may have added that last line for good measure. We all know we'll be on our way to some crappy bowl game after this. Maybe a Tire Bowl, or a Mary Kay Cosmetics Bowl... whatever. I'm ready for next season to start. Then, hope begins again.
A big sigh of relief... it's almost over.
Love the Doctor,
The B.S.C.
No comments:
Post a Comment